I'm sick of meeting men in person...what not to do.

WTF? Etiquette when hitting on or hooking up with a girl.

Okay I don't personally use pick-up lines because I'm just not overly interested in finding hook ups and prefer honesty. However, I have had plenty used on me.

TIME YOUR APPROACH: My biggest pet peeve is timing when a guy approaches. I usually go out to bars and other places to SURPISE hang out with the people I came with. I really find it to be a hard off when I am mid-sentence and some jackass shows up at my table with something stupid to say. Timing is everything and there is usually empty moments during a conversation, or the person you are interested in gets up to grab a drink or go to the bathroom. This is your time... make it count.

DON'T BE SEXIST: don't use lines that make you sound like a sexist pig. I've had lines like “where's your husband at?”, “you're cute, why are you single?” “Why aren't you married?”. All of these make you sound like a man from the 1920's. I am not a 1920's housewife. I am not married because I don't want to be. I am not married because I am an independent woman. Just because some women dream about making house, does not mean we all do and it's not a compliment for you to say things that suggest something is wrong with me because I am not married.

ONE LINERS: I personally don't mind the corny pick up lines as long as you realize they are corny and you are only using them to be funny. Using a one-liner and being completely serious enters you into the creepy category. Nobody wants to be in the creepy category. I like more original one liners that haven't been done over and over and over. If you can make a girl laugh then you have one foot in the door. My favorites used were “nice shoes, wanna fuck?”, “I can't taste my lips, can I taste yours?”

IMPRESS THE FRIENDS: If a girl is with her friends when you meet her then don't ignore them. However, there is a fine line between being friendly and being flirty. You will put off an entire group of girls if you flirt with them all. Pick one and make her feel special but don't exclude her friends... remember: girl friends are the best cock blockers.

LISTEN: nobody wants to repeat themselves. Period. Also, if you are interested in a girl, then remembering her name is probably a good thing. I can't tell you the amount of times a guy spent the better part of the night hitting on me and I have to repeatedly tell him my name and/or answer the same questions. This is always a hard off and I eventually leave...without them.

DON'T BE A DRUNKARD: You are making a first impression. Liquid courage is sometimes needed however being shit housed is likely frowned upon by any girl. Also, ever hear of whiskey dick? If you are only after a one night stand, being drunk won't do you any favors (or her). Most girls over 25 are aware of this phenomenon and it's not even worth our time. Not to mention, I have never met an inebriated casanova. You make think you are but really you are probably just a slurring, stumbling fool. Lay off the alcohol and save yourself some money.

COMPLIMENT: compliments are underrated. Girls like when guys compliment them. Most girls are self conscious about something and compliments are always appreciated. Girls face criticism from other girls and guys alike so in this dog eat dog world, it's nice to hear someone say something nice.

DON'T OVERSHARE: I am guilty of over-sharing but I also know that some things are the kiss of death. I was at a gay bar once and this older gentleman sat next to me. He told me how he is bi-curious and came there to find a man. Later, in the evening he started telling me that he questioned his bi-curiosity since he couldn't keep his eyes off me. This was just weird and not flattering. Another guy told me all about his divorce, kids and drama with both just before he asked me out. To me that translates as you are not over your ex and I won't touch you with a 5 foot pole.

THE TAKEAWAY: This is maybe your best offense and best way to avoid rejection. It's been used on me personally twice and always works, even though I know exactly what they are up to. So the takeaway is when you approach a girl that you find attractive as you are heading somewhere else in the building (re: bathroom, bar, etc). As you pass her, you lean in and whisper a compliment to her. The specific ones used on me were “you are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen” and “you are gorgeous.” You then continue walking to where ever your destination was. This will immediately peak her interest into who you are. She will either come up to you or continue to look at you if it worked. If neither of those happen then you didn't get rejected cause all you did was paid a compliment and made someone else feel good about themselves.

STAY IN YOUR LEAGUE: If you are a 4, don't go for the 10. If you are 40, unless you are rich then no 20 year old wants you. The biggest reason people get rejected is because they try to go out of their league. If you are in a bar trying to get a hookup then it's all shallowness so don't get butt hurt when someone way hotter than you says no. You chose the person because they were hot, they rejected you because you weren't. Deal with it and find someone closer to your own number.

DON'T LIE: Don't lie to people to get them into bed. If you are married, fess up. Plenty of girls don't mind and you should be finding those girls. Don't tell a girl you will call, when in fact you have no intention of calling. Never tell someone you love them when you don't. Men always wonder how they get themselves in weird situations... because you say things, anything, to get a woman in your bed. Quit with that shit and just be real. Girls like sex too and don't need lies to get them into the bedroom. In fact, honesty is so refreshing that you are likely to have more success with a girl like me.

RESPECT: at the end of the day, you should respect everyone until they give you a reason not to respect them. Girls like to be treated nicely. Open the fucking door for her especially if she has decided to open her legs to you. Pretend like you have manners around women: no talking with food in your mouth, say please, say thank you, don't make sexiest comments, open doors, no burping loudly, farting, cover your mouth when you cough, etc. I realize that a lot of woman have lost their manners but that is a different topic. Oh and please don't spit in my drink while you are talking (another reason not to be a drunkard).

Online dating has a whole different set of rules which I may write about at a later time. The moral of this story to meeting a girl in person is to compliment her, be honest and treat her with respect. Decide in advance if you are there to hit on girls or get drunk and for God sake's stay within your league.